{"id":4014,"date":"2010-01-16T11:15:18","date_gmt":"2010-01-16T08:15:18","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/localhost\/wordpress\/2010\/01\/16\/tanri-bilir-ya-duduk-otturmekten-baskaca-hic-bir-sucum-yoktu-bay-duduk-aziz-nesin\/"},"modified":"2010-01-16T11:15:18","modified_gmt":"2010-01-16T08:15:18","slug":"tanri-bilir-ya-duduk-otturmekten-baskaca-hic-bir-sucum-yoktu-bay-duduk-aziz-nesin","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/narteks.net\/index.php\/2010\/01\/16\/tanri-bilir-ya-duduk-otturmekten-baskaca-hic-bir-sucum-yoktu-bay-duduk-aziz-nesin\/","title":{"rendered":"Tanr\u0131 bilir ya, d\u00fcd\u00fck \u00f6tt\u00fcrmekten ba\u015fkaca hi\u00e7 bir su\u00e7um yoktu | Bay D\u00fcd\u00fck – Aziz Nesin"},"content":{"rendered":"

<\/p>\n

S\u00fcrte s\u00fcrte bir oldum. K\u0131smetim ba\u011flanm\u0131\u015f demek. Kimse bana i\u015f vermiyor, hi\u00e7bir yerde i\u015f bulam\u0131yorum. insan darda kald\u0131 m\u0131, en olmayacak \u015feyleri bile d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyor. Ma\u00e7ka’dan Dolmabah\u00e7e’ye do\u011fru, iste b\u00f6yle en olmayacak \u015feyleri d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcne d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcne gidiyordum. Stadyumun \u00f6n\u00fcne geldim, bir ana baba g\u00fcn\u00fc. \u00f6yle kalabal\u0131k, caddeden ge\u00e7menin imk\u00e2n\u0131 yok. Bu adamlar stadyuma nas\u0131l giriyorlar? insan anaforunun i\u00e7inde, bir o yana, bir bu yana f\u0131rf\u0131r d\u00f6n\u00fcyordum.<\/p>\n

Bir dalga geliyor, elli metre a\u015fa\u011f\u0131 iniyoruz. \u00f6nden itiyorlar, yirmi ad\u0131m geri bas; arkadan dayan\u0131yorlar, otuz ad\u0131m \u00f6ne y\u00fcr\u00fc. D\u00f6rt yandan birden s\u0131k\u0131\u015ft\u0131r\u0131yorlar, o zaman oldu\u011fum yerde f\u0131r\u0131ldak gibi d\u00f6n\u00fcyorum. Bir yere geldim dayand\u0131m ki, s\u00f6k\u00fcp \u00e7\u0131kman\u0131n imk\u00e2n\u0131 yok. Kendimi bu insan seline b\u0131rakt\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 sanmay\u0131n. Ha babam zorluyorum. Ama nereye? Bir saat kadar debelendim, \u00e7abalad\u0131m, \u00e7\u0131rp\u0131nd\u0131m, o insan d\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm\u00fcn\u00fcn i\u00e7inden bir t\u00fcrl\u00fc kendimi s\u00f6k\u00fcp \u00e7\u0131karamad\u0131m. Bana \u00f6yle geldi ki, i\u00e7ine d\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm bu insan anaforundan bir daha \u00f6mr\u00fcm olduk\u00e7a art\u0131k kurtulamayaca\u011f\u0131m. O yana itile, bu yana kak\u0131la son solu\u011fumu \u015furac\u0131kta verip g\u00fcme gidece\u011fim. \u0130\u015fte tam o umutsuzluk s\u0131ramda, bir d\u00fcd\u00fck \u00f6tt\u00fc. D\u00fcd\u00fck ama, ne d\u00fcd\u00fck… Anadan do\u011fma sa\u011f\u0131r\u0131n duyaca\u011f\u0131 bir d\u00fcd\u00fck. D\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn \u00f6tmesiyle o birbirine kenetlenmi\u015f insan kalabal\u0131\u011f\u0131 \u015fak diye ikiye ayr\u0131ld\u0131. D\u00fcd\u00fckl\u00fc adama yol verdiler. Bir de bakt\u0131m: Aaa… Bizim Musa de\u011fil mi?\u00a0\u00a0 Musaaaa!… diye ba\u011f\u0131rd\u0131m. \u00abUlan Musaaa!…\u00bb diye de ba\u011f\u0131rabilirdim. Ama d\u00fcd\u00fc\u011fe olan sayg\u0131mdan olacak, b\u00f6yle diyemedim. Sesimi duyunca Musa elimden tuttu, beni o kalabal\u0131ktan \u00e7\u0131kard\u0131. Y\u00fcr\u00fcmeye ba\u015flad\u0131k. \u00f6n\u00fcm\u00fcz t\u0131kand\u0131k\u00e7a, Musa d\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcne as\u0131l\u0131yordu. D\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc duyanlar birbirlerini ezerek ka\u00e7\u0131\u015f\u0131yorlar, bize yol a\u00e7\u0131yorlard\u0131. Musa \u00f6nde, ben arkas\u0131nda, b\u00f6yle ilerleyerek stadyumun kap\u0131s\u0131na geldik. Musa bir d\u00fcd\u00fck de kap\u0131da \u00f6tt\u00fcrd\u00fc. Kap\u0131daki memur,\u00a0\u00a0 Buyurun! diye bize yol verdi. Turnikeden ge\u00e7tik i\u00e7eri girdik. Geni\u015f bir soluk al\u0131nca, Ulan Musa, sen Beden Terbiyesi Genel M\u00fcd\u00fcr\u00fc m\u00fc oldun? Nedir bu, d\u00fcd\u00fck elinde f\u0131rf\u0131r \u00f6tt\u00fcr\u00fcnce herkes sana yol veriyor? dedim. Beni b\u0131rak da sen kendini anlat, ne i\u015f yap\u0131yorsun? dedi. Hi\u00e7 bir i\u015f yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131m yok. Be\u015f ayd\u0131r i\u015f ar\u0131yorum. Ama erkeklere i\u015f yok. \u015eimdi gelirken onu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyordum. Bir iki makyaj yap\u0131p kad\u0131n k\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131na m\u0131 girsem? Ama onlar\u0131 do\u011fruluyorum. Ben de yan\u0131mda \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131rmak i\u00e7in birisini arasam, kaz\u0131k gibi bir erkek alaca\u011f\u0131ma, g\u00fczel bir kad\u0131n se\u00e7erdim, i\u00e7imde k\u00f6t\u00fcl\u00fck oldu\u011fundan de\u011fil. Nas\u0131l olsa ikisi de ayn\u0131 i\u015fi yapmayacak m\u0131, hi\u00e7 olmazsa, kar\u015f\u0131nda g\u00fczel bir kad\u0131n g\u00f6r\u00fcrs\u00fcn de g\u00f6nl\u00fcn g\u00f6z\u00fcn a\u00e7\u0131l\u0131r. Musa, Anla\u015f\u0131lan, sen iyice bitiksin… dedi. Hem de nas\u0131l! Be\u015f ay i\u015fsizlik ne demek? Ondan sonra ma\u00e7\u0131n heyecan\u0131yla konu\u015fmad\u0131k. Ma\u00e7tan \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131k. Musa, f\u0131rf\u0131r d\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc \u00f6tt\u00fcr\u00fcp bize yol a\u00e7\u0131yor. D\u00fczl\u00fc\u011fe \u00e7\u0131k\u0131nca,\u00a0\u00a0 Arabaya binelim, dedi. Binelim binmesine, ama nas\u0131l binece\u011fiz? Ben diyeyim be\u015f y\u00fcz ki\u015fi, siz deyin bin ki\u015fi araba, otob\u00fcs bekliyor. Bir bo\u015f araba geldi mi, y\u00fcz ki\u015fi birden ko\u015fuyor. Bize iki g\u00fcnde s\u0131ra gelmez Musa, Sen dur! dedi. \u00d6n\u00fcm\u00fczden bir taksi ge\u00e7erken, cebinden d\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc \u00e7\u0131kar\u0131p, f\u0131\u0131r f\u0131\u0131\u0131r \u00f6tt\u00fcrd\u00fc. D\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc \u00f6tt\u00fcrmesiyle h\u0131zla giden taksi d\u00f6nd\u00fc; geldi \u00f6n\u00fcm\u00fczde durdu. Biz taksiye bindik. \u0130\u015fin \u015fa\u015f\u0131lacak yan\u0131, bo\u015f arabaya ba\u015fkalar\u0131 sald\u0131rmad\u0131. Arabada,\u00a0\u00a0 Ulan Musa, yoksa sen Trafik M\u00fcd\u00fcr\u00fc m\u00fc oldun? dedim. Parma\u011f\u0131n\u0131 duda\u011f\u0131na g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcp \u00absus!\u00bb i\u015fareti yapt\u0131. Ni\u015fanta\u015f\u0131’nda taksiden indik. Musa c\u00fczdana davrand\u0131. \u015eof\u00f6r: Aya\u011f\u0131n\u0131 \u00f6peyim \u00e2bi, para istemez kurban olay\u0131m… dedi. Para almad\u0131. \u015eof\u00f6r tan\u0131d\u0131k m\u0131? dedim. Yoo… dedi. Ulan Musa, yoksa sen Polis M\u00fcd\u00fcr\u00fc m\u00fc oldun? Yine bir \u00absus!\u00bb i\u015fareti verdi.\u00a0\u00a0 Surdan \u00f6teberi alal\u0131m da eve gidelim, dedi. Kasaba gittik. Kasap d\u00fckk\u00e2n\u0131n\u0131n \u00f6n\u00fcnde bir kuyruk var, sonu g\u00f6r\u00fcnm\u00fcyor. Kuyruktakiler s\u0131ra kavgas\u0131 yap\u0131yorlar, birbirlerine girmi\u015fler. Bizim Musa hemen d\u00fcd\u00fc\u011fe sar\u0131ld\u0131. D\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn \u00f6tmesiyle, herkes yerli yerine \u00e7ekildi. Kasap da d\u0131\u015far\u0131 u\u011fray\u0131p, Musa’ya,\u00a0\u00a0 Buyurun! dedi. Biz kuyru\u011fu yar\u0131p i\u00e7eri girdik. Bir kilo bonfile… Kasap soruyor: Ba\u015fka emriniz? Beyin var m\u0131? On tane yeter mi? Kasap paketi yapt\u0131. Musa c\u00fczdan\u0131 \u00e7\u0131kard\u0131. Kasap, Vallahi olmaz Beyefendi… diye paray\u0131 almad\u0131. Ama biz etleri ald\u0131k, d\u0131\u015far\u0131 \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131k. Ulan Musa, yoksa sen Belediye M\u00fcd\u00fcr\u00fc m\u00fc oldun? Benim sorular\u0131ma hep, sus, diyor.\u00a0\u00a0 Bu aksam yeme\u011fi d\u0131\u015far\u0131da yeriz. Bu ald\u0131klar\u0131m yar\u0131na, dedi. Ertesi g\u00fcn pazar. Neler istersin? dedi. Hi\u00e7 bir \u015fey istemem, dedim. Efendim oradan gittik manava. Oradan gittik bakkala. Bizim Musa, d\u00fckk\u00e2ndan i\u00e7eri girmeden \u00f6nce bir kere d\u00fcd\u00fc\u011fe as\u0131l\u0131yor. Ondan sonra i\u00e7eri giriyor. Elimiz kolumuz paket doldu. Hi\u00e7 bir yere de on para verdi\u011fi yok. Bir d\u00fcd\u00fck daha \u00f6tt\u00fcr\u00fcp bir taksi \u00e7evirdi. Apartman\u0131na gittik \u015eof\u00f6re:\u00a0\u00a0 Bekle! dedi. Musa bek\u00e2r. Apart\u0131man\u0131nda bir ba\u015f\u0131na oturuyor. Elimizdekilerini b\u0131rakt\u0131k. Kap\u0131da bekleyen taksiye bindik. Bir gazinoya gittik. O \u015fof\u00f6r de para almad\u0131. Gazino t\u0131kl\u0131m t\u0131kl\u0131m dolu. Musa d\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc fora etti. Daha a\u011fz\u0131na g\u00f6t\u00fcrmeye kalmadan gazinonun \u00f6nce garsonlar\u0131, arkadan sahibi olacak, biri ko\u015ftu. Bize, sahnenin \u00f6n\u00fcnde, bir masa koydular. Biz bi\u015fey istemeden masay\u0131 donatt\u0131lar.\u00a0\u00a0 Ulan Musa, yoksa m\u00fcfetti\u015f misin? Ben sorduk\u00e7a, sus, diyor, ba\u015fka bir \u015fey demiyor. Musa b\u00fcy\u00fck bi\u015fey olmu\u015f ama ne olmu\u015f? Bir t\u00fcrl\u00fc \u00e7\u0131karam\u0131yorum. Sazlar, \u015fark\u0131lar ba\u015flad\u0131. Biz de kafalar\u0131 \u00e7ekiyoruz. Garsonlar etraf\u0131m\u0131zda pervane olmu\u015flar. Derken arkada bir g\u00fcr\u00fclt\u00fc koptu. Sarho\u015flar birbirlerine girdiler. Onlar b\u0131\u00e7aklar\u0131 fora ederken bizim Musa da d\u00fcd\u00fc\u011fe as\u0131ld\u0131. O aslan kesilmi\u015f kavgac\u0131lar, d\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn bir f\u0131\u0131rt etmesiyle uyuz it gibi kuyruklar\u0131m k\u0131s\u0131p oturdular. Bu bizim Musa ne olmu\u015f? D\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyorum, d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyorum, bir t\u00fcrl\u00fc bulam\u0131yorum. Gazinodaki hesap \u015f\u00f6yle b\u00f6yle ikiy\u00fcz liray\u0131 buldu. Gazinocu \u00abpara almam da almam\u00bb diyor. Bir arabaya bindik, eve geldik. Ertesi g\u00fcn pazar. Musa kollar\u0131 s\u0131vay\u0131p kendi eliyle yemekler yapt\u0131. Ben gidecek oldum.\u00a0\u00a0 Olmaz, dedi, bir hafta misafirim ol da akl\u0131n ba\u015f\u0131na gelsin. Bir hafta Musa’n\u0131n evinde yan gelip yatt\u0131m. Geziyoruz, tozuyoruz, e\u011fleniyoruz. Musa’n\u0131n hi\u00e7 bir yere on para verdi\u011fi yok. O verse de alm\u0131yorlar.\u00a0\u00a0 Ulan Musa, sen bir b\u00fcy\u00fck adam olmu\u015fsun ama ne? S\u00f6yle \u015funu! diyorum. S\u00f6ylemiyor. En sonunda,\u00a0\u00a0 S\u00f6ylerim, ama kimseye s\u00f6ylemeyeceksin, dedi. S\u00f6ylemem, Dinine? S\u00f6ylemem. iman\u0131na? S\u00f6ylemem. Yemin yemin \u00fcst\u00fcne. Kimseye s\u00f6ylemeyece\u011fime iyice inand\u0131ktan sonra, cebinden d\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc \u00e7\u0131kard\u0131, \u00f6pt\u00fc, ba\u015f\u0131na koydu. iste birader, dedi, b\u00fct\u00fcn keramet bu m\u00fcbarek d\u00fcd\u00fckte. Bir g\u00fcn Karak\u00f6y’de dolmu\u015f bekliyordum. Kuyrukta bekle bekle, s\u0131ra gelece\u011fi yok. Elimdeki zincire ba\u011fl\u0131 d\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc sallay\u0131p dururken her nas\u0131lsa dalg\u0131nl\u0131kla d\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc a\u011fz\u0131ma g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcp \u00f6tt\u00fcrm\u00fc\u015f\u00fcm. Oradan bir memur ko\u015fup geldi, sel\u00e2m\u0131 \u00e7akt\u0131. Sen olsan ne yapars\u0131n? Bilmem! \u00abintizam\u0131 temin edin o\u011flum!\u00bb dedim, y\u00fcr\u00fcd\u00fcm; Biraz gittim. Kalabal\u0131ktan, caddeden kar\u015f\u0131ya ge\u00e7emiyorum. D\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc \u00e7\u0131kar\u0131p \u00f6tt\u00fcrd\u00fcm. B\u00fct\u00fcn ta\u015f\u0131tlar durdu. Kars\u0131ya ge\u00e7tim, \u00abYahu bu ne i\u015f?\u00bb dedim kendi kendime. D\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc \u00f6tt\u00fcrd\u00fcn m\u00fc, i\u015fler istedi\u011fin gibi y\u00fcr\u00fcyor. Sonra anlad\u0131m birader. Bizde b\u00fct\u00fcn i\u015fler d\u00fcd\u00fckle y\u00fcr\u00fcmez mi? Vapur d\u00fcd\u00fckle kalkar, tren d\u00fcd\u00fckle kalkar. Araba d\u00fcd\u00fckle durur. Kavgac\u0131 d\u00fcd\u00fckle bar\u0131\u015f g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015f olur. Hatt\u00e2 d\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn sesini duyan ka\u00e7ar. Bak, \u015fimdi \u015fu meydanda bir d\u00fcd\u00fck \u00f6tt\u00fcreyim, \u00e7il yavrusu gibi herkes bir yana da\u011f\u0131l\u0131r… O zaman anlad\u0131m, bizde b\u00fct\u00fcn i\u015fler d\u00fcd\u00fckle y\u00fcr\u00fcyor. O g\u00fcn bug\u00fcn i\u015fte bu d\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn sayesinde ge\u00e7inip gidiyorum. Bak, dinine, iman\u0131na ba\u015fkas\u0131na s\u00f6yleme. Yoksa eline bir d\u00fcd\u00fck ge\u00e7iren f\u0131rlar ortaya. \u0130\u015fe kesat girer. S\u00f6ylemeyece\u011fime yemin ettim, ama, yazmam diye yemin etmedim ya… \u0130\u015fte yaz\u0131yorum. Simdi benim de sizden bir ricam var. Su s\u00f6yleyeceklerimi siz de sak\u0131n ba\u015fkas\u0131na s\u00f6ylemeyin. Musa’dan ayr\u0131l\u0131nca hemen bir d\u00fcd\u00fck de ben sat\u0131n ald\u0131m. Taksim meydan\u0131nda bir d\u00fcd\u00fck \u00f6tt\u00fcrd\u00fcm. Gelgelelim, hi\u00e7 kimse d\u00fcd\u00fc\u011fe ald\u0131r\u0131\u015f etmedi\u011fi gibi, ilk \u00f6tt\u00fcr\u00fc\u015fte beni yakalad\u0131lar. Ertesi g\u00fcn de gazeteler \u00abSahte m\u00fcfetti\u015f yakaland\u0131\u00bb, \u00abKendine polis s\u00fcs\u00fc veren biri tutuldu\u00bb gibi benim i\u00e7in yazmad\u0131k s\u00f6z b\u0131rakmad\u0131lar. Oysa, Tanr\u0131 bilir ya, d\u00fcd\u00fck \u00f6tt\u00fcrmekten ba\u015fkaca hi\u00e7 bir su\u00e7um yoktu. Ondan sonra anlad\u0131m ki, bizde d\u00fcd\u00fck ge\u00e7iyor ge\u00e7mesine ama, \u00f6tt\u00fcrmesini bileceksin. Benim gibi, d\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc \u00f6tt\u00fcr\u00fcrken, elin aya\u011f\u0131n titrer, \u00f6tt\u00fcrsem mi, \u00f6tt\u00fcrmesem mi diye ku\u015fkuya d\u00fc\u015fersen hap\u0131 yuttu\u011fun g\u00fcnd\u00fcr. Benim de sizden ricam, d\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn nas\u0131l \u00f6tt\u00fcr\u00fclece\u011fini ba\u015fkalar\u0131na s\u00f6ylememenizdir. Yoksa d\u00fcd\u00fck, \u00f6tt\u00fcrmesini bilen i\u00e7in \u00e7ok i\u015flere yar\u0131yor.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

S\u00fcrte s\u00fcrte bir oldum. K\u0131smetim ba\u011flanm\u0131\u015f demek. Kimse bana i\u015f vermiyor, hi\u00e7bir yerde i\u015f bulam\u0131yorum. insan darda kald\u0131 m\u0131, en olmayacak \u015feyleri bile d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyor. Ma\u00e7ka’dan Dolmabah\u00e7e’ye do\u011fru, iste b\u00f6yle en olmayacak \u015feyleri d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcne d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcne gidiyordum. Stadyumun \u00f6n\u00fcne geldim, bir ana baba g\u00fcn\u00fc. \u00f6yle kalabal\u0131k, caddeden ge\u00e7menin imk\u00e2n\u0131 yok. Bu adamlar stadyuma nas\u0131l giriyorlar? insan anaforunun […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[114],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-4014","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","6":"category-turkiye-den-oykuler"},"yoast_head":"\nTanr\u0131 bilir ya, d\u00fcd\u00fck \u00f6tt\u00fcrmekten ba\u015fkaca hi\u00e7 bir su\u00e7um yoktu | Bay D\u00fcd\u00fck - Aziz Nesin - narteks.net<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/narteks.net\/index.php\/2010\/01\/16\/tanri-bilir-ya-duduk-otturmekten-baskaca-hic-bir-sucum-yoktu-bay-duduk-aziz-nesin\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"tr_TR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Tanr\u0131 bilir ya, d\u00fcd\u00fck \u00f6tt\u00fcrmekten ba\u015fkaca hi\u00e7 bir su\u00e7um yoktu | Bay D\u00fcd\u00fck - Aziz Nesin\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"S\u00fcrte s\u00fcrte bir oldum. 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