\u00a0<\/p>\n
\u00d6nce sol kula\u011f\u0131ndan
Sonra da sa\u011f kula\u011f\u0131ndan vurdum
Daha sonra da kemerinin tokas\u0131n\u0131 s\u0131ms\u0131cak kur\u015funla y\u0131rtt\u0131m
Sonra da geriye ne kald\u0131ysa
Vurdum
Ve o da pantolonunu \u00e7ekmek ve bilyelerini
Almak i\u00e7in e\u011fildi
(zavall\u0131 mahluk)
bir daha kalkmas\u0131na l\u00fczum
kalmayacak \u015fekilde
i\u015finin icab\u0131na bakt\u0131m.<\/p>\n
\u0130\u015fte bu kadar.Ayak \u00fcst\u00fc bir\u015fey i\u00e7mek
i\u00e7in i\u00e7eri girdim
Herifin biri bana
yan yan bak\u0131yor gibiydi
zaten o da \u00f6yle \u00f6ld\u00fc-
yan yan,
bana bakarak
ve bilyelerine
sar\u0131larak.<\/p>\n
Kan g\u00f6r\u00fcnt\u00fcs\u00fc i\u015ftah\u0131m\u0131 a\u00e7t\u0131
Denebilir.
Domuz etli bir sand\u00f6vi\u00e7 yedim
birka\u00e7 ac\u0131kl\u0131 \u015fark\u0131 dinledim…
B\u00fct\u00fcn lambalar\u0131 kur\u015funlad\u0131m
ve d\u0131\u015far\u0131 \u00e7\u0131k\u0131p dola\u015ft\u0131m.
Etrafta hi\u00e7 kmse yokmu\u015f gibi g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcyordu
bende at\u0131m\u0131 vurdum
(zavall\u0131 mahluk).<\/p>\n
Sonra \u015ferife g\u00f6z\u00fcm tak\u0131ld\u0131
yolun sonunda duruyodu
titriodu
sanki kutsal bir dans yap\u0131yodu;
\u00e7ok ac\u0131kl\u0131 bir manzarayd\u0131
bende onun titremesini
birinci kur\u015funla azaltt\u0131m
ikinci kur\u015funla ise titremesini (i\u00e7im burkularak ? )
tamamen durdurdum<\/p>\n
Bir m\u00fcddet s\u0131rt\u00fcst\u00fc uzand\u0131m
ve y\u0131ld\u0131zlar\u0131 teker teker vurup
a\u015fa\u011f\u0131ya indirdim
ve sonra da mehtab\u0131 vurdum
ve sonra da etraf\u0131 dola\u015f\u0131p
kasabadaki b\u00fct\u00fcn \u0131\u015f\u0131klar\u0131 a\u015fa\u011f\u0131 indirdim,
ard\u0131ndan etraf kararmaya ba\u015flad\u0131
hakikaten karard\u0131 etraf
tam istedi\u011fim gibi;
uyurken y\u00fcz\u00fcme \u0131\u015f\u0131k vurmas\u0131na
dayanamam da.<\/p>\n
Uzan\u0131p d\u00fc\u015f g\u00f6rd\u00fcm
yine k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir \u00e7ocuktum
Oyuncak bir alt\u0131patlarla oynuyodum
ve t\u00fcm bilye oyunlar\u0131n\u0131 kazan\u0131yodum
uyand\u0131\u011f\u0131mda
silahlar\u0131m yoktu
ellerim ve ayaklar\u0131m ba\u011fl\u0131yd\u0131
sanki birileri benden korkuyor gibiydi
sanki o \u00e7irkin benden
korkuyor gibiydi
sanki o \u00e7irkin boynuna
bir ilmek ge\u00e7iriyolard\u0131
sanki beni asmaya
\u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131yolard\u0131,
herifin teki g\u00f6mle\u011fime
\u015f\u00f6yle bir tabela as\u0131yodu:
senin i\u00e7in de bir kanun var.
benim i\u00e7in de kanun, bir de
a\u011fac\u0131n birinden sallanan bir
kanun var.<\/p>\n
Eh g\u00fczel \u015fiir her zaman
g\u00f6zlerimi ya\u015fartm\u0131\u015ft\u0131r
inan\u0131rm\u0131s\u0131n\u0131z ki, t\u00fcm
kad\u0131nlar a\u011fl\u0131yolard\u0131
inlemeleri aras\u0131nda
ba\u015fka adamlar\u0131n adlar\u0131 duyulsa da
benim i\u00e7in a\u011flad\u0131klar\u0131n\u0131 biliyorum
(zavall\u0131 mahluklar)
her biriyle yatmama ra\u011fmen, o b\u00fcy\u00fck
heyecen i\u00e7inde onlara ad\u0131m\u0131
s\u00f6ylemeyi unutmu\u015f olmal\u0131y\u0131m
t\u00fcm erkekler k\u0131zg\u0131n g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcyordu
san\u0131r\u0131m \u00e7ocuklar\u0131n\u0131n sayg\u0131s\u0131zca
bana teneke kutular atmas\u0131ndan olacak.
ama onlara \u00fcz\u00fclmemelerini s\u00f6yledim
\u00e7\u00fcnk\u00fc nas\u0131l olsa \u00e7ocuklar\u0131n ni\u015fan kabiliyeti yoktu
aralar\u0131ndan tek biri bile erkek
olamayacakt\u0131-
%90 \u0131 homaseks\u00fcel olacak, topunun
can\u0131 cehenneme, birka\u00e7 herif ba\u011f\u0131rd\u0131
‘ onu cehenneme yoll\u0131yal\u0131m!’
Art\u0131k son dans\u0131m\u0131 yap\u0131odum
ama a\u00e7\u0131ktan ald\u0131m a\u00e7\u0131y\u0131
barmenin g\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fcn i\u00e7ine t\u00fck\u00fcrd\u00fcm
ve Nellie Adam \u0131n g\u00f6\u011f\u00fcslerine
tak\u0131ld\u0131 g\u00f6zlerim,
a\u011fz\u0131m suland\u0131 tekrar.<\/p>\n
Charles BUKOWSK\u0130<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
\u00a0 \u00d6nce sol kula\u011f\u0131ndanSonra da sa\u011f kula\u011f\u0131ndan vurdumDaha sonra da kemerinin tokas\u0131n\u0131 s\u0131ms\u0131cak kur\u015funla y\u0131rtt\u0131mSonra da geriye ne kald\u0131ysaVurdumVe o da pantolonunu \u00e7ekmek ve bilyeleriniAlmak i\u00e7in e\u011fildi(zavall\u0131 mahluk)bir daha kalkmas\u0131na l\u00fczumkalmayacak \u015fekildei\u015finin icab\u0131na bakt\u0131m. \u0130\u015fte bu kadar.Ayak \u00fcst\u00fc bir\u015fey i\u00e7meki\u00e7in i\u00e7eri girdimHerifin biri banayan yan bak\u0131yor gibiydizaten o da \u00f6yle \u00f6ld\u00fc-yan yan,bana bakarakve bilyelerinesar\u0131larak. Kan […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[132],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-6640","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","6":"category-charles-bukowski"},"yoast_head":"\n